So, I've never really talked much (on here anyway) about breastfeeding. I guess I feel as though it is time now, because my feelings are different now with baby number two.
With Declan, breastfeeding was pretty much the hardest work I had ever done. My body wasn't completely built for it, and he had a hard-ish time latching. When I was in the hospital, a nurse had to assist me every single time, and I ended up giving him some formula right from the get-go because there was NO WAY I could nurse him while any visiting person was in the room. I had to have complete focus to attempt to do it.
This didn't deter me from doing it. It took a solid six weeks at least to get the hang of it. They say it usually takes about three. Not for us. It hurt. So badly. I would have to hold my breath and count to take my mind off the pain of him latching and starting to eat. I had to watch where he was, so using a cape wasn't really an option. Basically I would have to get naked from the waist up and cry during the whole thing. OH, and he was never really satiated. He ate. All. The. Time. There were days when I couldn't remember my last time outside because I was stuck on the couch feeding him. He would eat every hour and for 45 minutes each time. Now, folks that don't know... that means about 15 minutes in the mean time. I didn't eat unless Logan was there to feed me.
I made it through six months with both nursing and some formula. I knew that I was doing the best thing for him and that there were benefits for me. I felt the bond between us. But it was work. And I really did feel like I had "gotten through" it rather than enjoyed our special time together.
This time it is so different. I don't know if it is because my body changed from Dex, or if Kieran is just a different baby. From the first time he latched on, he was a pro. He eats efficiently and gets right to it. He fills himself up quickly and while it's more often than the "every three hours" I hear happens with other babies, (Not mine, that's for sure) it works. It is so much more convenient than lugging formula around everywhere, and so much more cost effective. With him I am able to use a cover and feed him any time anywhere. I am slowly getting over my consciousness of the public around me and realize that I'm doing what is best for my baby.
While I think it changes the relationship that Logan has with him, I'm really happy that this is all working out better this time around.
And I figure that since we're not spending money on formula because I'm able to provide nourishment for our baby... a little bit of that money we're saving can be spent on yummy treats for mommy!... Right? Or is that just me?